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Wounded Boys - Courageous
Men
Photo Essay, Male Survivors' Stories
Copyright © 1997 by E. Jane Mundy R.R. # 3 Thessalon, Ontario,
P0R lL0, 705-841-1140, 416-740-9805
This exhibition WOUNDED BOYS - COURAGEOUS
MEN is dedicated to the survivors of institutionalized child
abuse.
Over one thousand formers wards from two Catholic
operated reform institutions for boys have come forward with stories
of horrendous abuse. The abuses suffered by these children were
at the hands of the Christian Brothers and other adults in position
of authority entrusted in their care. Over thirty Brothers, former
Brothers and lay staff have been charged and convicted with more
than two hundred crimes. These crimes included physical, sexual,
emotional, cultural and spiritual rape. This is the largest sexual
abuse case known in Canadian history. Charges continue to be
laid.
The students were from different cultural economic
backgrounds. They were sent to the schools for a variety of reasons:
delinquency, incorrigibility, abandonment, poverty and for protection
from abusive homes. Some students were placed in the schools
at six years of age and remained there until eighteen.
This exhibition WOUNDED BOYS - COURAGEOUS
MEN is a random sampling of the stories of these men. I had
the privilege of meeting, interviewing and photographing each
of these men and their families. As I shared the pain of my child
sexual abuse by the Catholic clergy the climate of safety was
created and their sharing stretched my levels of courage to its
limits. The barriers between men and women dissolved as we moved
past our fear and I found strength to listen to over forty men.
I have images of men next to the photographs
of the little boys they once were. Some men have no photographs
of themselves as children. The absence of this image speaks louder
to me . . . . a childhood lost. Once they were all vulnerable
children.
Sexual abuse to children is not confined to
institutionalized environments. It happens wherever there is
an imbalance of power and lack of respect for human dignity.
The misuse of power knows no economic or social boundaries. Therefore
perpetrators come from all walks of life and wear many masks.
The selection of poetry has been written by
survivors from these institutions. Through poetry these men are
able to express the pain and effects suffered from their childhood
as well as their healing process. This is part of their healing
journey.
I thank all the men who had the courage to
break the silence and share their stories. Through this sacred
sharing my voice too, has been restored. I would like to thank
you, the viewer, for your courage and openness. I hope this presentation
allows you to listen and to hear these voices.
The messages contained within each piece of art work have been
rewritten to make concise what each man wanted to share. The
interviews of these men produced many pages of transcribed material.
I was respectful of their voice and have tried to keep their
message intact as it was told. I take the responsibility of presenting
their voice seriously.
Comments from the Exhibition
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Your work has captured the pain, humiliation,
degradation the victims experienced. Thankyou. Lynn
Kainz
May God continue to heal and richly bless each
hurting soul in this exhibit - I wept.
Jenny Burridge
Your exhibit is truly an honour for all the
lost children, those who survived and those who didn't, my brother
didn't. Bonnie Nerman
Imagine what took place in the residential
schools, and what its doing to our children. While I was here
I can hear the echoes of crying children not hear and I am one
of them. Keep the journey going. Thanks. Marlene
Etherington
I too hear the children screaming and crying.
I was there. Alice Niganobe
You've healed my view of men - Thank you.
Mary Guentner
Your passionate commitment continues to inspire
me. Thank you for the great gift you have given to the world.
Rev. Sarah Reith
It's a fantastic exhibit and I only wish more
and more people to see it. I've been here three times in three
days and I go away feeling worse each time. The room is full
with a chill! The energy is strong. Best wishes for your future
endeavours. John C. Barnett
I was raised in Jersey Channel Islands, by
the Christian Brothers, De La Salle College. I witnessed the
beatings in class, but as most of us learned to be quiet not a
word was spoken in defence of the students as this was the custom
at that time. What a penalty was paid for these early lessons
in being educated. Henry Meri
I think many people knew of this for years
and years but "no one spoke about it." Thankyou for
your courage to speak out. B.
Onisnenko
My son is ten years old. He has a learning
disability. Reading for him is extremely difficult - in fact
its' not his favourite thing to do. He took the time to read
everything (it took him three hours). His comment to me "Mom
why were these children treated like this? People are much to
cruel." My heart hurts. Mother
of Simon a ten year old from Alberta
As a therapist, who has worked with survivors
of St. Joseph's and St. John's this exhibit brings home the horror
of what went on in these places. The truth stands out and hits
you right in the face. As I read and look at the photographs,
I have flashbacks of what I was told. I admire the courage of
these men. Gsele Martin
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Childhood should be a happy
time, nurturing time, caring time, loving time, and a time to
learn and develop. At St. John's it wasn't happy. I was placed
there in November 1957 after my mother suicided. I was an illegitimate
child and I had to pray for forgiveness for my mother's lust.
I was twelve years old.
Healing through group sharing
I could begin by listening to other people and realize their story
was my story - their abuse was my abuse. I wasn't alone and I
realized I wasn't dirty or bad.
They abused a sacred trust
and took that trust and misused it for their own self gratification.
This authority was a gift from the Creator and they abused it
as they ruined the lives of many generations to come. It will
take seven generations to heal this evil. Paul
Goulet Windsor, Ontario
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Yesterday I took a walk down
the alleyways of my mind. As you know there are places you dare
not go alone. I was drowned by the tears of a little child.
His sobs would have broken the heart of any living person. As
I drew near I was taken with the fears of the unknown. Everything
said ... NO DON'T GO! But I was driven to get help because
everything became darker and more frightening. I was leaving
this hard unforgiving world and returning to forty years ago.
As I came closer I saw ...
he was me. As I reached out to help him, he turned on me like
a vicious hurricane. With the voice of a hardened man he said
... Are you like them? This inner child was a child who never
had a chance to play. In his eyes I saw fear, misplaced trust
and enough anger to take a life. I remembered the gospel ...
suffer the little children to come to me. So I sat behind him
and shared his pain.
This bastard child, an outcast,
a social leper. I spoke to him softly and told him I was there
to help. I cried and played with him. My many years of surviving
as a victim began change. We can be restored to wholeness.
Leo Mongeon North Bay, Ontario
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THROUGH EXPRESSION I RECLAIM
MY VOICE ....
MY WORK IS MY VOICE
TO ....
SPEAK THE UNSPEAKABLE ....
Wayne Rempel
Toronto, Ontario
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Related stories:
"False" Memories, Repressed Memories, by Scott Abraham.
Domestic Violence: By Women as Well as Men. Our domestic violence page has an article Working with Violent Women by Erin Pizzey, author of Prone to Violence, a summary and full transcript from a segment of Great Britain's BBC1 show Panorama that focused on woman who sexually abuse children, facts about domestic violence by women and men, and information on dealing with anger.
Battered Husbands. We hear a lot about domestic violence against women, but not nearly so much about domestic violence against men. But it's there. One reason that domestic violence against men keeps happening is that men don't speak out. And when they do, all too frequently, nobody listens. Our Battered Husbands section has feature articles from the Detroit Times and Orlando Sentinal that speak to the seriousness of the problem.
Take Care of Your Mother - Or Else, by Scott Abraham.
Revenge: A Dish Best Served Cold, by Scott Abraham.
Be Gone!, by Scott Abraham.
Climbing Out From Hell, by Jeffrey Miller.
Survival and Living, by Scott Abraham.
Healing from Childhood Sexual Abuse: Book Reviews, by Scott Abraham.
Yes, Women Do Abuse, by Scott Abraham
John Lee on Anger, an interview with John Lee
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